As you know, sweet Cute as a Button is coming to live with us. She has had a bit of a delay due to the need for a few more dates with the handsome Rebel Without A Cause. By the way, if I get a doeling out of this breeding I'm going to name her A Cause. Kidding? Maybe not, I kind of like it. Anyway we have been building a pen for Buttons and looking at it gets me thinking I need another goat to put in there with her. Hmmmmm there was another doe at the farm that caught my eye. She might be a nice addition as well. You see where this is going.
Then I see a darling buck on the site that is for sale. I love his coloring. He is a flashy black and white pinto. I love his sire and his pedigree blends well with my goats. I talk myself into buying him too. Even though I think I don't really want a buck. But, I tell myself, he is very nice and I probably do need my own buck. So I tell the gal I want him and will pick him up when I get Buttons.
Then it happens. The feeling that I made a mistake. This feeling usually happens about 3 in the morning. 3 a.m. is what I call my worry time. It is when everything is bigger than life. Problems seem insurmountable, bills seem unpayable. A new buck seems unnecessary and down right crazy. By 7 a.m. I've talked myself out of anything I've talked myself into.
So I got up this morning and emailed the gal and said for her not to hold him for me and that when I come get Buttons I will look at him and if I fall in love, like I did with Buttons, then I would consider getting him. I apologized for being flaky. She emails back and says she may go ahead and wether him since I am the 5th person to flake out. Yikes! That's drastic.
Feeling like I made the right decision I carry on with my day. Then I talk to the goatfarmer and explain my waffling feelings. She is no help. She loves the buck too. She loves his coloring. She loves his pedigree. She talks about breeding him to Cora Belle to get more flashy black and white goats. By the end of the conversation I want him back.
But it's getting late and I want to sleep tonight so I fight the feeling that I want to email her back and say not to wether him and I will come look at him.
Then I remember why I don't want a buck.
See why I can never be in politics? I have no idea what I stand for.
what do you think?